![]() An alienator may insist the child’s personal items all be kept at the alienator’s house, regardless of how much time the kid spends with the other parent.An alienator may prevent a child from seeing or talking to the other parent, while saying that the alienated is busy/occupied/uninterested in the child.This can certainly make the child feel alienated themselves, as well as angry at (and feeling personally hurt by) something that was really between mom and dad. An alienator might divulge unnecessary relational details - for example, instances of affairs - to a child.So are you or your ex-partner an alienator, alienating the other parent? Here are some signs that may exist: Signs that parental alienation may be taking place He also said the child should show negative behaviors when with the alienated parent and have difficulty with custody transitions. Gardner later added that to be diagnosed with PAS, the child should have a strong bond with the alienator and previously have had a strong bond with the alienated. The child’s feelings of hatred toward the alienated parent expand to include other family members related to that parent (for example, grandparents or cousins on that side of the family).The child uses terms and phrases that seem borrowed from adult language when referring to situations that never happened or happened before the child’s memory.The child doesn’t feel guilty about mistreating or hating the alienated parent.The child has unwavering support for the alienator.(In reality, in PA, the alienating parent is said to “program” the child with these ideas.) The child claims the criticisms are all their own conclusions and based on their own independent thinking.This is sometimes called “lack of ambivalence.” The child’s feelings about the alienated parent aren’t mixed - they’re all negative, with no redeeming qualities to be found.The child doesn’t have any strong evidence, specific examples, or justifications for the criticisms - or only has false reasoning.The child constantly and unfairly criticizes the alienated parent (sometimes called a “campaign of denigration”).When Gardner talked about PAS, he identified eight “symptoms” (or criteria) for it: Signs and symptoms of parental alienation syndrome Sometimes, the parent doing the bad-mouthing is called the alienator and the parent who is the subject of the criticism is the alienated. If a child is repeatedly told, for example, that dad is a bad person and doesn’t want to see them - even if it isn’t true - the child may eventually refuse to talk to or see dad when the opportunity arises. This distorts the child’s perception of the alienated parent, regardless of how great their relationship was with that parent before.īasically, the parent-child relationship suffers, whether the allegations are true or not. Or a dad tells his child that their mom prefers her new family (and kids with a new partner) to them.Īccusations can be mild, or they can become incredibly severe. ![]() For example, perhaps mom tells her child that their dad doesn’t love them or want to see them. ![]() Parental alienation is when one parent discredits the other parent to a child or children the two share. That doesn’t mean the situation and its mental health effects don’t happen. So PAS isn’t really considered an official syndrome in the mental health or scientific fields, and it’s not something your child can be diagnosed with. It stands to reason that it can affect mental health. And there’s no doubt that a damaged parent-child relationship can be a big problem. PAS also isn’t recognized as a mental health condition by the:īut the DSM-5 does have a code for “child affected by parental relationship distress,” which PAS would fall under. How do other experts in the field feel about this? First things first - there’s this large manual, called the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5, since it’s currently in its 5th revision), that lists mental health conditions recognized by the American Psychiatric Association. The child psychologist who first coined the term parental alienation syndrome (PAS) in 1985, Richard Gardner, used it to describe behaviors in a child who is exposed to parental alienation (PA). What is this ‘syndrome’ - and is it real?
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